


Gah, Humbugs!

by methylviolet10b



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Prompt Fic, humbugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-14
Updated: 2012-12-14
Packaged: 2017-11-21 02:49:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/592599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/methylviolet10b/pseuds/methylviolet10b
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes going the extra distance has extra consequences.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gah, Humbugs!

**Author's Note:**

> Tis the season for giving, and during this month, I'm giving presents to those who ask - and to some who deserve them regardless. First up: Happy Holidays to sabrinaphynn! You asked for peppermint, preferably in humbug form, you got humbugs, among other things.;-) What can I say, your food-related prompts are dangerous. I hope you like your present!
> 
> Warnings: Utterly ridiculous dialogue-only fic. Holiday treats and 'treats.' Humbugs.

“Urgh.”

“You can say that again.”

“That wasn’t a word, John.”

“So? You said it all the same. And ‘urgh’ pretty much defines how we’re both feeling, I think.”

“If ‘urgh’ can be interpreted as a wish for unconsciousness or death, then yes. Or at the very least, a wish to never have to eat again.”

“I can’t believe you actually made me eat that.”

“It was necessary for the case, John. Our cover would have been blown otherwise. And it wasn’t just _you_. I ate it too. Unfortunately.”

“What kind of sadist comes up with something like that, anyway? Are you sure the chef isn’t our killer?”

“Positive, although I think we can both make a convincing case for culinary assault. Gah. And my hot-water bottle is going cold. Give me your heating pad?”

“Nothing doing. If you want one, you go out and get one yourself. Or ask Mrs. Hudson if she has one to spare.”

“You’re a doctor, John. I’m sick. You should be tending to me. What happened to the Hippocratic oath?”

“Doesn’t apply in this case. You’ve got a bellyache for precisely the same reason I do: you insisted on us eating the eggnog double-decker cheesecake with fudge filling, the port-praline syllabub, _and_ the holiday Death by Chocolate topped with three kinds of nuts and crushed peppermint humbugs!”

“Oh God. I want to throw up just thinking about it.”

“You and me both. I feel as green as you look.”

“John?”

“Yes, Sherlock?”

“In the future, if we should ever encounter another case involving an American cook in a holiday dessert contest - ”

“…as if that’s at all likely…”

“It happened once. It might happen again. And if it should, you have my full permission to remind me of this, and tell me not to take the case.”

“…really?”

“Absolutely. I never want to risk feeling like this, not ever again.”

“Oh. Um. Okay.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Sherlock. Here, budge over. If you sit close enough, we can share my heating pad.”

“That would require moving.”

“Yes, it would.”

“…okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted December 13, 2012


End file.
